Advitica

Well-being and prosperity

No I don't need to tell any of you that parents and adults often use guilt as a tactic to try and control you. The reason they do it is that it can be highly effective. The thing is though, when it becomes over-used it is a nasty tactic to repeatedly use. I have seen mom's in particular use this - not so much dads. 

What I mean is when somone tries to use guilt on you as a way to control your behaviour. It could be anything from making us feel guilty about eating food, spending money or playing online. 

The problem is that when someone repeatedly and consistently applies guilt tactics to you that it eats into your supply of self-esteem. So if you have a good self-esteem then a small amount of loss is incidental. Otherwise you will have to find friends to help build up your self-esteem again.

Guilt can often be served up as conditional giving, like 'I am going to give you this toy but you have to promise to look after it'. They set you up well in advance so that they can call in a few additional guilt trips at any time. Also if you ever criticize them on anything, they have an arsenal of guilt-bombs to throw at you. 

Personally I dont like being on the receiving end of guilt tactics. In particular I would like to talk about framing them and recognising when they are being used against you, because often they are covert assults.

People use guilt trips all the time. I find it is especially effective when you tell someone "not to worry about it" but they know you care. Sometimes it is uncalled for to use guilt trips on people, but there are times that a person should be made to feel guilty and ashamed of what they did.